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Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Guy Cry Movies

Lets get one thing straight... they say its only appropriate for a guy to cry when his dog dies or his team wins the championship. I'd add movies to that list. No folks, its not man-o-pause. It's acknowledging the plain, simple truth that we dudes are sensitive beasts. And while were not exactly grabbing the Kleenex during "Atonement", we prefer to wear long sleeves during "Brian's Song".

Be it sports, wars, father/son opus', epic adventures, and even the occasional romance... releasing your inner Boehner is becoming more accepted. This list eliminates the need to run for the kitchen to do some impetuous onion peeling. Let em flow brothers, let em flow.

1. Rudy - If you don't shed a tear at this one, you have no heart. In fact, you're devoid of dreams, ambitions, and hope. This is more than a sports movie... it's the story we all want to live out; a young man who fights his way into everything and only at the last second is rewarded by his resiliency and grit. The music too, just makes you want to live an epic life.

2. Saving Private Ryan - When Captain Miller grabs Pvt James Ryan and whispers, "Earn this", we realize that the old man in the beginning is the title character. "Tell me I'm a good man", he says to his wife. As I've seen older men handle the end of their lives, the word honorable is a common theme. This film represents what it is to have honor, and that resonates a truly loud echo for those men that see this film both as a hallmark to the halls of masculinity, and those who have seen war.

3. It's A Wonderful Life - No man is a failure who has friends. Who doesn't shed one at this? Sure it's a Christmas movie, but it's about a man who despite his dreams floundering, finds that the quality of life lies with those who you've influenced.

4. Field of Dreams - The unspoken words between father and son can resonate for ages after either have passed. Sometimes those wounds never heal, but a few people by divine chance are given a second pass at repairing said inflictions. Baseball, while not every ones fancy has an ability to bring the most diverse of personalities into harmonious communion. When Ray plays catch with his father at the end of the film, you finally realize that despite past differences, there will forever be a bond rooted in love.

5. Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Khan - Spock dying, you know the scene. "You are and will always be... my friend." Shit.

6. Old Yeller - How do you not put this one on the list? Last September my parents put my beagle Margie to sleep while I was away on a training event. Upon coming home I cried at her her little plot, complete with a cross and a wreath. Yeah I cried. We'll every time you watch Old Yeller, it's like putting you're dog to sleep over... and over... and over again. Only you have to shoot it. All that to say, that dog was pretty amazing.

7. Braveheart - Sacrifice. This film has one scene in particular that tugs on the heart strings. Specifically where William Wallace rallies the army to stay and fight. "Show England that they make take our lives, but they'll never take.... our freedom." This monologue soars the heart and makes even the meekest of us believe we can take on the world. And yeah, it brings a condensation to the optics.

8. The Notebook - It's become more socially acceptable to have seen this. It's also become more acceptable to cry. Say what you want, but yeah, it's a great film, and an epic romance. I watched this film with a bunch of dudes while deployed to the middle east. There wasn't one dry eye in the midst of us. My one friend even said as the beginning credits rolled that should he myst up, he would deliver an ass whooping. What happened? He was too sad.

9. Brian's Song - Chances are you haven't seen this film. And it's your loss because this film is truly touching. A Hemingway quote leaves a tragic foreshadow saying, "Every true story ends in death. Well this is a true story." Again sports play backdrop to a very touching story of friendship, or more so, brotherhood. See this film.

10. Cool Runnings - OK, this isn't one typically associated with tears, but I loved John Candy when I was younger. This weird fact coupled with it being his last (good) movie and a somewhat touching finale of the film where the one racer's father exudes an enthusiasm in his son. A good film about a group of long shots who earn the respect of those they're trying to emulate.

11. Armageddon - Whatever.... Bruce Willis dies the way every real man wants to.... saving the world.

12. Love Actually - Don't act like this is a surprise. When the little boy runs after the "love of his life", we were all cheering for him. The better part of us was wishing him better luck than we had when our first loves slapped us in the face and stormed off.


  1. Awesome man! I have never seen The Notebook but I agree with all the other ones you put on there! Especially Love Actually! I think you forgot Shawshank though!

  2. see, I think Shawshank is great.. one of the best films ever... but I never once found myself even close to crying